First off, I was in the army for a bit, and could and did, until about a year ago curse like a sailor…  Always, from fairly early on, kind of felt it was silly not to use my four letter vocabulary.

That is until I was listening to some tapes, I believe by Mike Dooley, web site:  http://www.tut.com/ .  If I attribute this to the wrong person, sorry.  Mike’s audio programs are still fabulous regardless.  The gist was this, when we curse, we are asking the universe to curse us.  Like if we say, “God Dxxx” this car, when our car acts up.  Or “Fxxx Me”, what we are asking for is for the universe through the law of attraction, to do an injury to our car, or for the universe, or god/God, depending on your belief set, to do us personally an injury…

Well, I had been a believer in The Law (Law of Attraction or LOA) for a bit when I heard this, and it hit me like a ton of bricks.  For a while afterwards, I actually visibly shuddered when someone else would curse around me (recall I was a world class curser up till this point).  I very seldom curse now.  Last time I recall letting a good one out, I was intoxicated.  Gotta work on that still.  Work in progress.  Men at work.  Hard hat area.

A lot of programs tell us to avoid miscreation and leave us hanging on what might be called for with regards to positive creations in a situation calling for a world class expletive.  I twisted for a while and finally came up with some workable solutions which I am going to share with you for when only a good old fashioned expletive will do.  I realized I could go for God Bless it, or Bless it, or Bless me.  Said with gusto of course, it’s an expletive after all.  But do mean well with it.  Feelings count with creation.

I feel better when I say it.  And, letting it blurt out feels like it releases the energy that a good expletive accomplishes in its course.  And, believing the law as I do, I feel it helps create a better overall result through its creative power.

The other area on which I might go with this, and I hadn’t thought of this for my almost 50 years till this time, is I go with “Darn it!”  I had thought that “darn” was synonymous with the bad “D” word for most of my life.  Then I started thinking about it, and realized the one definition I know of from my youth on darning is, that darning is a form of mending folks used to do with wooden eggs and darning needles to mend sox whose heals had warn out.  So, if we consciously feel that darning is mending, and we say “darn it” we are asking the universe to mend something.  And, that is positive creation.

Peace and positive thoughts be with you,

Yucel

Many a time have I discussed with someone the value of compromise.  Usually, the feeling is that compromise is necessary for and the cornerstone of a well functioning relationship.

Are you surprised to learn I see it from a different vantage?  Well, here is the thing.  In compromise, you have two people both losing something. 

Wikipedia.org quotes, “In human relationships ‘compromise’ is often said to be an agreement that no party is happy with.”

One compromises on quality, compromises one’s virtue, etcetera, etcetera.

Compromise is effectively a capitulation of ones values or a giving in to get.  It is a lose lose, or at best a zero sum game.  (A zero sum game is where no value is created.  For something/someone to gain, something/someone else must lose.)

Better to find a win win solution.   It often takes more creativity, open mindedness, caring and time to determine a solution in which both parties win;  however, when such a solution is found, true value is created and no one is compromising.

An example of a zero sum game is poker.  For one person to win, someone else must lose.  I was playing poker about 6 months ago, and lost a bit of money.  I walked out not feel so good.  I realized it wasn’t the money I lost that made me feel bad.  It was something else.  Something not satisfying about what I had just gone through.  I realized that if I had won, then I might have felt better.  Then it hit me, for me to have felt better, I would have had to have won, which meant, someone else would have had to have lost.  When I realized that, I realized I could not really feel good about playing poker for money; because, I would not feel good knowing someone else felt bad.  I haven’t played poker for money since.

Now, if one were to play poker for clothes… with one’s lover… this could be a form of win win.  Your clothes come off first, you win, your partner’s clothes come off, you win.  By you, I mean both of you. This is win win.

Win win is good. 

Peace and added value on your journey,

Yucel