Category Archives: Choosing

The Power of Choosing

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Recently, I choose to arrive with a total availability and faith in a close relationship, where in the past I had arrived with a hesitancy and fear laden wanting in this and other relationships.

It felt so much more present, empowered and complete to be in relationship where I was fully choosing to be engaged in the moment, committed integrally with faith and without reserve.

I realized that fear of eventual failure in the relationship, which had been a prior pattern in this relationship and in past major relationships going back to infancy, created a kind of space where holding back had room to occur within me.   That this fear based holding back created a kind of 0h-well, here is my insurance policy life jacket hedge for when the expected happens safety blanket kind of fall back ready reserve.

Reserve, being what it is, held me back from fully engaging, from fully committing, from being fully present in the relationship.

I had been wanting in the past, instead of choosing my true desires.

Wanting being a form of desire for lack, is fear based.

Choosing is commitment.   ( for more on wanting and choosing see:  http://choose.ws/2009/10/29/positive-pivots/choosing/what-place-do-you-choose-for-want-in-your-life/yucel/ )

Choosing has an element of faith.

I could feel the difference this made in how I felt and arrived immediately and on goingly.

Being fully present and committed felt so much more alive and present than the fear based reserve and walking on egg shells ways of the past.

Where in the past, I had been awaiting the dropping of the other shoe, I “knew” on some level would drop, the second shoe always had fallen… , while in a kind of stupefied fear I walked on egg shells waiting,  now I was confident, alive, present, faithful, fully committed.

It felt powerful and fabulous.

Well, it turns out that this relationship ran on rocks.  Pretty soon, and pretty hard.

Interestingly, it still feels different.

Having chosen and bravely committed fully, holding nothing back with faith, where before there had been fear and reserve and want, on termination this time there could be no hope or optimism.   ( for more on hope and optimism see:  http://choose.ws/2009/11/09/what-is-reality/positive-realistic/is-hope-promiss/yucel/ )

In the space created by elimination of hope and optimism was room for realism. 

Having fully committed to and allowed the relationship, having arrived fully present and available, and with the relationship’s demise, having done all I could, realistically this time there could be no more I could do.

In the past, where I had been wanting, I had arrived with reserve. 

Arriving with reserve, a reserve I arrived with unconsciously or subconsciously, I always had something held back.  I could always arrive yet again with something more I could do, something more I could give.  There had always been an available built in extra tank of a bit more kindeling through which I could reignite my hopes and wants, my fears and lacks.

To quote the bard, “Cowards die many times before their deaths: The valiant never taste of death but once.”

In the past, I had been wanting and needy and had walked on egg shells and died many deaths, over and over and over again in hesitancy and hope.   This time, I was valiant, committed and having chosen, it was but one ending, eased by knowledge of having done all I could.   I could also allow and accept and even embrace the unfolding of my choice.

Yours in choice,

Yucel

 

 

Who am I?

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Who am I? …  What do I choose? …  I will live the question of what I choose, until I am living the answer.
 
I was guided using words similar to these by Rita, a meditation guide, recently during a guided meditation in Phoenix.
 
Her exact format was to ask “what” where I have written “choose”.
 
As you may imagine the version with choose felt better for me.  ( see also:  http://choose.ws/2009/10/29/positive-pivots/choosing/what-place-do-you-choose-for-want-in-your-life/yucel/ )
 
Though I did like very much like Rita’s overall format,  in my mind, I thought “choose” in place of “want” and the meditation resonated nicely for me this way.
 
On inquiry after finishing the session, Rita attributed her lyric source to something inspired through Deepak Chopra.
 
 I like using this phrasing and believe it works well for me.  Though I choose to use choose in place of want.   Alternatively, I might have chosen to use desire.
 
The phrasing helps me to allow more peacefully what is, as I am living the question of what I choose contentedly, while patently manifesting what will be, until it is.
   
I am grateful to Deepak and Rita for having carried the water this far. 
 
Touched now by me, it is passed on to you.
 
It is now for you to sip and decide for yourself if you will choose to keep it with you.
 
Peace on your journey,
Yucel

What Wanting does through the Law of Attraction

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The Law of Attraction ( LOA ) is always in motion.  It is set in motion by our thoughts and feelings, be they conscious, unconsious, and/or subconcious.

Choosing or desiding firmly sets the Law of Attraction in motion in manifesting that we have decided on or chosen.

Wanting is a form of desire for lack.

Wanting something will utilize the LOA to keep us wanting by creating more desire for lack.

Thus wanting can create a run away train effect of desire for lack.

Here is an example of a difference between wanting and desiding.

When you are standing in the cold, with your nose pressed up against the glass of a luxurious eating establishment, and you are wanting to enjoy such a delicious meal, you are in fact desiring what you lack.  You are cold and with out.

When you deside to go in to the restaurant, are seated at the table, with an open menu in your hand, and choose to order the lobster, you have choosen are warm, comfortable and will eat. 

The same thing applies to wanting other wants, for example wanting a million dollars.

Ask almost anyone, “You want a million dollars?”

The answer is typically,  “Yes, I want a million dollars.”

The world is full of poor blokes wanting a million dollars.

Show me someone who chooses to be abundant, who decides to have a million dollars, I’ll show you someone who has money flowing their way.

Yours in abundance,

Yucel

“You can choose.” Harry Browne

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“You don’t have to buy from anyone. You don’t have to work at any particular job. You don’t have to participate in any given relationship. You can choose.”
— Harry Browne

When we are often the most depressed, we often say, “we have no choice.”

We always a have a choice. 

To be more satisfied in our lives, we need merely choose that which we love and prefer.

What then of he or she who is drowning in a sea of choice?

Our minds and the Law of Attraction cannot distinguish between imagination and experience. 

Using this property of mind we can try out in mind our choices to see how the feel.

Try mentally making a choice of one of the choices.  Decide on it.  Try it on in your head.  Fully feel, imagine, how this choice plays out in your mind. Feel how it feels in your gut and system as you live this choice mentally.  Take note of the feelings.   You are not looking so much to see how the choice plays out.  Rather, you should focus on how the choice feels.  Your feelings know better than you thoughts how well the choice works for you.

Then try choosing mentally another of the possible choices.  Again, go through the feelings.

As you progress through the choices, one will feel better than the others.

Choose this choice over the others.

If they all feel less than good, get help to brain storm other choices.

If you run out of time and must choose, choose the choice which felt the best of the choices you ran through.

You can also try playing out how it feels not to choose.

Sometimes where we are is better than where we may be.

It’s all choice.

Yours in choice,

Yucel

How to get what I Want

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When do I get what I want?  How do I get what I want?  Am I getting what I want?  It’s really quite simple when you realize what you are choosing when you want.

What do I mean by this?

Many of us do not do the work of realizing through examination of contrast what is in our lives we desire not to choose any longer and what we now truly desire manifesting.  Michael Losier explains a great deal about this concept of contrasts in his writings. 

Am I getting what I want? 

The answer is simple if slightly convoluted.   We always get whatever we focus on, through The Law of Attraction. When we want something, we are focused on desire of what we lack.  What we thus create through wanting is more lack.

( for more on contrast or want as lack see also:  http://choose.ws/2009/10/29/positive-pivots/choosing/what-place-do-you-choose-for-want-in-your-life/yucel/ )

How do I get what I want?

As we want, we desire more lack.  As we desire more lack, we create lack in our lives.  So, as we focus on want, we create want and lack in our lives.  And, as we always get what we focus on, we always get want we want.

If you find that when you want something, you notice a feeling of lack and that the thing you want is not in fact in your life, you are noticing the creatation of more lack, which is exactly what want is. 

By focusing on want, or lack, we are perpetrating more lack.

If you desire something, or choose something, or prefer something, you will get a different result than if you want something.

As the rich get richer and the poor get poorer, you will have what you are in gratitude of and lack what you want.

How then may we create consciously?

To actually create something we desire in our lives, we focus on the idea or feeling of what it is that we desire. 

Then we realize this thing we desire is already there for us in the infinity of the universe. 

Being there for us, we can be grateful for it. 

Focused thus on having it and being grateful for it, we may choose it, and by choosing it further perpetrate and multiply its presence through and in our lives.

Yours in choice,

Yucel