Author Archives: Yucel

Authenticity, is it how we arrive?

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Have you every found yourself wondering at the authenticity of things, of your feelings,  of others?

Do you seem at times to be immersed in a bit of inauthenticity, which drive you to complain: 

She said she was going to do one thing, and did another!

The all you can eat burgers and lose 20 lbs diet, made my ass even bigger!!

But you said you wanted me to do that!!!

And so on…

We’ll have you ever considered how the life we perceive is one big mirror, and if we are seeing inauthenticity, inauthenticity may in affect be our own reflection:

Have you never given your phone number to someone you never intended to talk to?

Have you never considered that eating all the burgers you could eat is how your ass got big in the first place??

Have you never asked someone to do something for you, like wash your car, only to complain at the details of the job???

And so on…

I recently detected a pattern of how people were showing up in  my life.  People who were drawn to me and to whom I was drawn…  in patterns I considered, well frustrating.

On deeper examination, what I realized further was, these pattern existed for me since childhood.

These people, the new people, were mirrors of old reflections still shimmering within me.

To change how people are showing up in my life, I need to get more authentic about what is within me.

Isn’t it obviously inauthentic?  

If I keep choosing to shine out “all you can eat cheeseburgers for me,” my ass may grow larger in the mirror of my reflections.  Yes?

I do love cheeseburgers though.  Therefore, I need to take care to choose wisely ( authentically ), as opposed for example to choose opposites or in a willy nilly fashion:

I choose a no more delicious cheeseburger for me punishment diet!

A better more satisfying choice for me might be to choose something like:

I desire reasonable portions of delicious cheeseburgers, warm from the grill, with ample ketchup…

And so on…

Deliciously yours,

Yucel

 

 

 

12 Wonderful Instructions

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You may recall my suggestion about miscreation of the 10 Commandments.   Well, along the sames lines, how about I rewrite the 12 Wonderful Commandments to the 12 Wonderful Instructions.  Notice how they make you feel? 

( for 10 Commandments see:  ( http://choose.ws/2009/10/21/positive-pivots/law-of-attraction/could-the-venerable-10-commandments-be-causation-for-turmoil-among-jews-christains-and-muslims/yucel/  

for 12 Wonderful Commandments see:  http://choose.ws/2009/10/30/quotes/bill-martuge/12-wonderful-commandments/yucel )

The 12 Wonderful Instructions

1> Make your mind up to be happy.

2> Make the Best of your Circumstances.

3> Take yourself lightly.

4> Always please yourself.

5> Set your own standards.

6> Do the things you enjoy doing… with money that you have earned.

7> Always focus on solutions.

8> Only associate with people who you are joyous around.

9> Have many interests. Travel and or read about new places.

10> Let go of the dead, of sorrow and of mistakes.

11> Do for those less fortunate than yourself only what you can.

12> Keep busy at something.  A busy person is always happy.

Always be thankful.

Notice any difference in how you feel after reading each list?

Love,

Yucel

What of Giving and Having?

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Last week a new friend told me short comings of “want” in front of a Chinese restaurant.  While we decided that “choose” was a good replacement for “want,” “want” has been so pervasive in vernacular that full divorce is taking time.  So, the search for additional tools to wean myself of “want” continues…

As blogged later last week, other alternatives for “want” include various synonyms of choose:

  • decide
  • pick
  • embrace
  • prefer
  • desire
  • like
  • fancy
  • love

 On a slightly different tack, there is a form of The Law of Attraction ( LOA ) called The Law of Circulation ( LOC ).

The LOC states when we give freely, whatever we give circulates and is given back to us, some would say ten fold. 

This concept of give and it is given is an old one and is included in many ancient venerable texts such as the bible:

 “Give, and it shall be given unto you in good measure pressed down, and shaken together, and running over… for with the same measure that Ye mete, it shall be measured to you again.”  Luke 6:38

 It is important to note that in giving, we give freely, and without desire for getting.  We cannot give what we do not have.  So, when we give, we acknowledge freely to ourselves that we gave because we have.

It is also important not to give till it hurts.  If it hurts as we give, hurt is put into circulation and hurt comes back to us.

If we give not freely, when we get it too will come back not freely, that is at a cost.

So as we give, we should give freely.

If we give freely and lovingly, it then comes back to us freely and lovingly through LOC.

What then if we “want” a cheeseburger?  What if we “give” a cheeseburger to someone, perhaps a friend?

If we want love, how about we give love to someone?

If we want money, what if we give money freely to some worthy cuase or person?

Remember, wanting is lacking.  We could just as easily have said or thought “lack” in each of the above “want” sentences.

Since we cannot give what we do not have, if we give love to someone, we are giving what we have.   As we know, through LOA we get more of what we have.  Thus we increase the love in our lives through its giving.

When we freely give love, we might then just have more love.

Give freely all you give.

Yours in love,

Yucel

The Secret

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“Do what you love to do. Keep doing it. Make it an intention that it will support you abundantly. Look for a way to do it and you will be led to it, step by step.”

— Marc Allen

Can it really be this simple? Yes it can. Every desire comes prepackaged with the means for its fulfillment, but most of us are so conditioned to things being difficult, we overlook the simplicity of success altogether. That’s how it’s managed to remain a secret all this time.

May you always understand that success is yours for the taking.

Love

Bill Martuge

Don’t regret growth

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We all make mistakes.  It’s part of the legacy of being human. Sometimes we even get so caught up in blaming ourselves for “mistakes” that we lose sight of what the past really is – a path to our present self. If you’re caught up in the language and thought process of woulda, coulda, shoulda, it’s time to stop!

Go easy on yourself. Offer yourself the kind of unconditional love you give others, and you’ll be amazed at the healing and empowerment you’ll find.

If that isn’t enough reason for letting go of days (and ways) gone by, here are a few more:

It was right at the time
There may have been a career path you’d have chosen that would have made you a higher earner by now, but you would have missed out on all those adventures that made you you. You might not have stayed in that relationship had you known what you know now – but you didn’t. You knew you needed the love, the safety or the challenges you were getting there. Don’t sell your past self short. We make decisions based on our best guesses at the time. And who knows? Those guesses could have been better for you than you know.

The road not taken isn’t on the map
Do you know why the grass is always greener on the other side? Because we can’t quite make it there from here. You don’t know what would have happened had you made different choices. If you hadn’t called it off with your ex, do you really know that you’d be happy? If you’d left your dead-end job earlier, who’s to say you’d be in your dream job now?

Instead of worrying about what wasn’t (or what you think “should have been”), concentrate on making choices that help you be you who you want to be now. Maybe you wish you hadn’t strayed in your last relationship. Great – don’t do it in this one! But that doesn’t mean you and your ex would have found bliss together. There are unexpected things we cannot control along life’s journey and you can’t know how things “would” have turned out. What we can control is who we are and how we react to the challenges (unexpected and otherwise) that arise. 

Don’t regret growth
So you know now that if you had a do-over, you’d make some different choices. Stop beating yourself up and instead, take that as a measure of success! Look how far you’ve come! If the goal is to one day be wiser than we are, then being wiser than we were is actually an achievement. But that achievement is only possible if you can see a decision or two as a misguided, immature or just plain dumb.

If you can look back on a past you and know you wouldn’t make the same mistakes – different ones, perhaps, but not the same ones – then congratulations! That’s how you know you’re doing it right.

Love

Bill Martuge